*deep breath*

I want to talk about religion today. Specifically Christianity, but all others as well. It's been on my mind a lot this past week, and I would just like to have a general discussion of what I believe, what I don't believe, and how I feel. Feel free to comment about how I'm wrong, what you think I'm right about, how YOU feel, etc.

First of all, I am not a religious person. I don't KNOW what's out there - I don't know if there's a God, or many gods, or a giant tree, or a life as a hedgehog waiting for me when I die. I don't know, but I am not necessarily writing any of these off either. My eyes are open to signs, I'm open to proof in any direction, but as of yet, I haven't seen any.

I have a few major issues with Christianity specifically, and with organized religion as an idea. My issues with Christianity pretty much lie with God - Jesus was a cool guy, he said nice things and did what he could to make things better. God, on the other hand, is kind of a jerk. He's a little like an abusive boyfriend: you can't hang out with any other guys 'cause he's so jealous, he takes credit for the good things that happen but blame the bad stuff on you, and he tells you what to do and if you don't do it, you're screwed. I have issues with worshipping (shut up wiggly red line, I WANT TWO P'S IN THAT WORD) someone who does that kind of stuff. My biggest issue is the "you go to Heaven only if you believe in God" clause. I'm a pretty decent person - am I destined to burn in Hell JUST because I don't blindly believe in God? I don't think that's fair.

I feel like religion used to be a private, personal thing - you had this relationship with God, you prayed and went to church and had that community, and you lived your life in accordance with the Bible (or whatever it is you followed). Nowadays it's shoved in everyone's faces, forced to the foreground. I don't want your beliefs shouted at me as I walk down the street. I don't want to be forced to talk to someone about Jesus every time I step outside my house. That's what you believe, and that's awesome. I don't care. But you don't see me knocking on your door at 7 AM asking if I can tell you why God doesn't exist. I don't force pamphlets into your hands outside the mall detailing why you need to stop believing in Jesus or you'll be abducted by aliens. So you keep your beliefs in your house and your church, I'll keep my non-beliefs to myself, and we'll all be happy.

I'm not bashing anyone's beliefs, by the way. I respect everyone's equally: if I'm in a Christian household, I bow my head for grace; if I'm invited to Passover, I observe all of their traditions; if I were ever around Buddhists or Hindus, I would do my best not to offend them, too. Just because I don't believe doesn't mean I don't respect that you do. But if I respect your belief, I feel it's only fair that you respect my disbelief. Just don't try to convert me and we'll be fine.

Okay, so my issue with organized religion as a whole is this - it seems as though religion has become less and less about God and faith and compassion (which is really what all religions are about, being a good person and loving your God/s), and more and more about who is right. Who cares who's right? If you're a Jew and you think you're the ones who believe the right thing, why does it MATTER if I'm a Hindu and believe the wrong thing? Why does it MATTER, if you're Christian and I'm Buddhist, if I'm not going to Heaven? Why does it MATTER if Heaven doesn't exist, and all the atheists are right? Who really cares? Believe what you believe, do what you think is right, and let everyone else do their own thing. You're not going to force anyone into truly being a Christian, or a Jew, or a Buddhist, or WHATEVER, so just go about your own business. Love God or Allah or Krishna however you want, but LEAVE EVERYONE ELSE ALONE. Stop killing people over whose God is real. Stop attacking people for believing something you don't. I mean, we don't attack people for believing that French is a better language than Spanish, do we? We don't start wars over whether red is a better color than blue. No one has to die over anyone's opinion on Crocs, so why is religion different? If I'm allowed to hate Spanish, love red, and burn a pile of Crocs on my front lawn without a war breaking out, why am I not allowed to be an atheist without starting something? (... for the record, I want to speak both French and Spanish, like both red and blue, and DETEST Crocs. :D)

I just don't understand. I don't understand how some people can call themselves "Christian" while rejecting everything that Jesus Christ taught. I don't understand why these people get to go to Heaven while I'm not good enough. I don't understand why no one can see that all religions are exactly the same at the core - do good things, be a nice person, love your fellow man. And I know that a lot of the religion thing is the relationship with God, which is great and wonderful and I sometimes wish I had that, but that shouldn't be between anyone but you and God. Don't drag me into it hoping to convert me, don't use it to try to prove someone of a different faith "wrong," don't talk about it unasked or without some real reason. Your relationship with God should be private, while the benefits of that relationship should be public - your heart, your soul, your love, your kindness. These are the things we need more of, not arguments over whose God could kick whose God's omnipotent butt.

While we're at it - atheists, QUIT BEING JERKS. There is no reason for you to bash people for believing something YOU don't, either. I know, they started it by preaching to you, but SERIOUSLY. Just quietly don't believe in God, and if someone's offending you by all means speak up, but other than that, just LET IT GO. There's no need to offend people or just generally be mean. Like I said above, you keep your beliefs to yourself, we'll KEEP OUR NON-BELIEFS TO OURSELVES, and everyone will be happy, yeah? YEAH?! (I'm serious. It's just as pointless for an atheist to try to convince a Christian that God doesn't exist as it is the other way around.)

Okay. So this is my religion post. I might have more to say about it sometime, but aside from comments I'm hoping to leave it alone for a while. I don't like to talk about religion. I never want to offend people, but I don't want to be converted. I just don't. I don't want to believe in the Christian version of God, because I don't agree with what he teaches and I can't see any proof that he exists. The minute that changes, I'll let you know.

You want to know what I believe in? The majesty of nature. The mind-blowingness of science. Love of all kinds. The kind of magic that lives in nighttime car rides while blasting the Smiths with the windows down. Family and friends. Connecting to strangers in ways you never expected and creating amazing friendships. Music, how it can touch thousands of people in the same way, and yet differently. Evolution. Saving our planet. Helping people in need. Perhaps some force that helps and guides us, but how we ultimately have a choice. Dumbledore and Harry Potter. People, sometimes, though it's difficult when I watch the news. No day but today - I believe that there is only this, and we need to make it the best we can and improve it for the generations to follow. I don't care what happens after I die as long as I have made my life meaningful, touched someone else's life in a positive way, and hopefully made the world a little bit better for everyone else to live in.